When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing withfficeffice" />
creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatures of emotion,
creatures bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.
Bitter criticism caused the sensitive Thomas Hardy, one of the finest
novelists ever to enrich English literature, to give up forever the
writing of fiction. Criticism drove Thomas Chatterton, the English
poet, to suicide.
Benjamin Franklin, tactless in his youth, became so diplomatic, so
adroit at handling people, that he was made American Ambassador
to France. The secret of his success? "I will speak ill of no man," he
said, " . . and speak all the good I know of everybody."
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain - and most fools do.
But it takes character and self-control to be under-standing and
forgiving.
"A great man shows his greatness," said Carlyle, "by the way he
treats little men."
Bob Hoover, a famous test pilot and frequent per-former at air
shows, was returning to his home in Los Angeles from an air show in
San Diego. As described in the magazine Flight Operations, at three
hundred feet in the air, both engines suddenly stopped. By deft
maneuvering he managed to land the plane, but it was badly
damaged although nobody was hurt.
Hoover's first act after the emergency landing was to inspect the
airplane's fuel. Just as he suspected, the World War II propeller
plane he had been flying had been fueled with jet fuel rather than
gasoline.
Upon returning to the airport, he asked to see the mechanic who had
serviced his airplane. The young man was sick with the agony of his
mistake. Tears streamed down his face as Hoover approached. He
had just caused the loss of a very expensive plane and could have
caused the loss of three lives as well.
You can imagine Hoover's anger. One could anticipate the tonguelashing that this proud and precise pilot would unleash for that
carelessness. But Hoover didn't scold the mechanic; he didn't even
criticize him. Instead, he put his big arm around the man's shoulder
and said, "To show you I'm sure that you'll never do this again, I
want you to service my F-51 tomorrow."
Often parents are tempted to criticize their children. You would
expect me to say "don't." But I will not, I am merely going to say,
"Before you criticize them, read one of the classics of American
journalism, 'Father Forgets.' " It originally appeared as an editorial in
the People's Home Journnl. We are reprinting it here with the
author's permission, as condensed in the Reader's Digest:
"Father Forgets" is one of those little pieces which-dashed of in a
moment of sincere feeling - strikes an echoing chord in so many
readers as to become a perenial reprint favorite. Since its first
appearance, "Father Forgets" has been reproduced, writes the
author, W, Livingston Larned, "in hundreds of magazines and house
organs, and in newspapers the country over. It has been reprinted
almost as extensively in many foreign languages. I have given
personal permission to thousands who wished to read it from school,
church, and lecture platforms. It has been 'on the air' on countless
occasions and programs. Oddly enough, college periodicals have
used it, and high-school magazines. Sometimes a little piece seems
mysteriously to 'click.' This one certainly did." |